Need of deliberation process after encountering infidelity

Overcoming from the feeling of betrayal is very difficult and if it is marital infidelity then it is devastating in nature. Numbers of couple who are suffering from breach of loyalty are increasing day by day. Infidelity brings lot of challenges for the couple and handling it with the process of deliberation is very important.

EFFECTS OF INFIDELITY

The most painful experience which is damaging in marital infidelity is its effects and they are traumatic in nature. As it is dealing with feeling like guilt, anger, betrayal. Only few marriages can survive the difficulties of infidelity. The most common effect of infidelity is the loss of trust towards their spouse and in marriage. The victim spouse generally goes through acute stress disorder. Fights between spouse increases and couple have to deal with the society as well.

THINGS WHICH SHOULD BE AVOIDED

After encountering infidelity most victim spouse blame themselves as the reason why their spouse breached the loyalty mark, this self-blame should be avoided. Any third party intervention should be avoided be it family, friends or well-wisher. Don’t go for an immediate separation, self-deliberation is required and all the possibilities should be kept open. It’s important to think about future before taking any drastic step. Fights should be avoided and discussion with calmness is required in these circumstances, as hurting the one who have hurt you won’t be healthy. Couple should realise that things will not normalise overnight.

SECOND CHANCE SHOULD BE GIVEN

It’s not is easy to forgive infidelity, only few couples forgive and overcome this phase. It requires a great deal of effort to forgive and forget. This is true that victim spouse will never forget even if he or she forgives. With that the spouse who has committed the malicious act of infidelity has to make more effort. Open discussion on why it happened and to regain the trust of the victim spouse is not very easy. As couple they had to be more responsible and should try to rebuild their relationship and try to remove the insecurity in their relationship and strengthening confidence.

DIVORCE AS AN OTHER ALTERNATIVE

Forgiveness in infidelity is a rare thing. Once trust is lost in marital relationship it’s difficult to rebuild. The insecurity that it could happen again cannot be avoided and when you see that your spouse is repeatedly cheating on you and doesn’t bring any change in his or her behaviour then the only alternative is divorce. When you see that your spouse is not apologetic about the act of infidelity or doesn’t have any substantial reason behind adultery then it’s time for separation. Just because of children some couple try to overlook the issue of infidelity and doesn’t go for separation, this shouldn’t be done. It’s important for children to grow in healthy environment and it’s not possible in an unhappy and low grade environment as the relationship of the couple is not healthy.

SUMMARY

Neither divorce is easy nor should rebuilding your marriage but couple be open to all alternative. They shouldn’t jump on divorcing the other. Deliberation is important before making any decision. Divorce is not the only solution for infidelity. Consideration of circumstances is important.